So I’ve racked up another audition notch in the old “Things you do since your in NYC and you aren’t working a real job so you better at least get your ass out there and do something” belt.

A local comedy club had their 1st of probably 2 auditions that they seem to do every year. I’ve done it at least twice before, which I imagine I shouldn’t really mention since obviously I didn’t pass. But I continue on in hopes for that comedic validation that all of us comics seek.

Last time I went to the audition I was about 1 of 5 that got there around 2 hours before the doors actually opened. Even when it kicked off it was only about 9 of us. So this time in an attempt to not feel silly I arrived for a 5pm audition at approximately 4:50pm.

I was number 61 on the list.

In the universe’s bid to make me throw my own feces, not unlike a monkey, at my fellow humans, the situation that I was oh so ready for ended up being completely different from what i expected.

To add insult to injury, I literally knew about 7 of the near 75 people online. There’s such an influx of new comics,the old comics who have moved forward, plus the comics who just say “Fuck this shit, I’m going for ‘Live At Gotham’” that I stand there like a stranger. I couldn’t sit through the 2 & a half hours that I was supposed to watch of comedy, so I sat outside and tried to time my entry to atleast less than 40 minutes before I had to go up.

“How’d it go Elon?”

I have no clue.

I sat there guessing between 3 or 4 bits that I could do. One has a quicker punchline. One is more unique to my style of comedy, so forth and so on. I then just went with what got me my last call back(to which, when I went back I decided to do a completely different bit. Yes, my friends have all yelled at me sufficiently, thank you.) and in a room that had watched about 3 hours of comedy already, they went with it. Even the comedy club owner’s friend(don’t know why he volunteered to watch all this with his owner buddy. I surely wouldn’t have.) came to me and said it was funny, but I have no clue how that helps me. ‘TELL YOUR BUDDY!’ is what I should have said. I replied with a silly ‘Thank you.’

Argh.

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