So for those of you who might have been keeping track. It seems that I have hit the 3 month mark with “The Girl.”

The most surprising part about this, besides the fact that we have not attempted to take each others lives nor our own, is the fact that we’re still happy to see each other.

Too bad my worlds about to implode.

You see, my Mother(no suitable link) wants to meet The Girl. The Girl wants to meet my Mother. And I’ve somehow foolishly let both parties know of this mutual desire for conference. 3 months in with The Girl, coupled with the abnormal amount of time we spend together implies some sort of seriousness about our relationship hence forth and hereby implying meeting of my Mother isn’t even that far fetched.

I’m hyperventilating.

My Mother is lovely woman. Really. I know I make a lot of jokes about her sanity and the lack thereof but really she’s a sweet lady. Crazy? Yes. But sweet. And I know she’s gonna go all super sweet on my ass when she meets El Chica(spanish for..well I’m gonna assume you can figure that out). And then they’re gonna start talking and of course come together in agreement of my shortcomings.

‘He is always late.’

‘He doesn’t listen to me either.’

‘Yeah, does he blame ADD with you to?’

And I’m going to sit there and start to cry a little on the inside. Next thing you know The Girl is gonna be like ‘Your so sweet Ms. White, you’re nothing like the woman Elon describes on his blog.’ and my Mother is going to be like ‘What blog?’ and then…then…

Okay. Must somehow stop this meeting. Operation: DivertDisaster is a foot.

Maybe it should be ‘a leg.’ Or ‘a fist.’ That sounds much better to me.

ejw

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