I’m going back to Corporate. I don’t know when, but I’m going.
I hate corporate america. I hate it with a passion as intense as 5000 suns. That are covered with little militant arab folks yelling something about challah bread or something. I despise the politics and the way things work and basically everything about the […]

Popularity: 16% [?]

When I was young I was shot.
Oh no, don’t worry. It was only in the face.
Not many people know this particular fun fact about me because I dont speak about it often. Normally you had to either be one of my closest friends or I was abnormally smitten with you to get such information out […]

Popularity: 4% [?]

I’m black.
Just in case you didnt know that I was black, that was a news flash for you. I remember my uncle, who I refer to on this blog only as Asshole, once asked me did I know I was black. I replied ‘I’m fairly sure.’ This was a mistake of gigantic proportions because at […]

Popularity: 9% [?]

Sent to me by “the girl” ©2005-2006. The text below isn’t copywritten. the term ‘the girl’ is. yeah. i will sue you. WHAT!
Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.
Macgyver […]

Popularity: 2% [?]

I hate people who say Be Carefull.
Because it could just be me, but everytime someone EVER says ‘Hey be carefull’ its normally right after I’ve tripped and fell and now have a concussion of some sort.
“Hey, be carefull!”
Really? You think I should be carefull? Where was your wonderous advice 30 seconds ago when i was […]

Popularity: 2% [?]

I snore.
Now please note, its not like I didn’t know I snored. It was like a piece of information that I knew about myself that although not something I was happy about, it wasn’t something that was going to keep me up at night.
Fact is, my snoring only really bothers other people around me when […]

Popularity: 9% [?]

So I have a Girlfriend.
Not a Girl_space_friend. But an actual, certified ‘I probably shouldn’t eat cheese cause if I do I’ll snore and then she wont be able to sleep and I don’t want that trouble’ type girlfriend.
Who’s confused by this idea?
Oooh! Oooh! Me! Me!
There is now another human being who could concievably become upset […]

Popularity: 4% [?]

Last night I was hanging out with GirlNYC at the Telephone Bar after the awesome “1$ dollar room” show (never did it before but it was pretty fricken cool) and during our conversation the birth of yet another awesome thing was born.
AssCo.
Thats right. AssCo. Not BcCo(although we all LOVE BcCo), this is AssCo. I’ve been […]

Popularity: 27% [?]

…Elon James White:
The UNIVERSE: Thank you guys for coming out today. I know we all have very hectic schedules so I’m going to try to make this brief. I’ve worked with you all many times and I have to say that we’ve done some damn decent work wouldn’t you all agree?
HAPPINESS: Yes, definitely.
SELF ESTEEM: Can’t […]

Popularity: 2% [?]