I hate Keanu Reeves.

I feel a need to get this out of my system. I’ve put up with a bitchload of bad acting for years, and now I just can’t take it anymore. I’m sitting here in the aftermath of “The Devils Advocate” which I liked, but I’m in absolute awe of this mans performance in it. What the fuck was up with the bad southern accent? OMG. Can I have him shot?

Okay maybe not shot.

Possibly severely beaten then tortured for several hours. I’ll call in this guy, Randolf. He’s this swedish torture master(Personally, I didn’t even know they HAD swedish torture masters) who would come to America just for the pleasure of inflicting pain on Keanu. First thing he’d do when he walked in would be just to stare at the tied up Keanu for like, an hour. Yeah, thats a good amount of time. An hour! Then, THEN he’ll start to tickle Keanu. And everytime Keanu laughs, Randolf will slap him in the face.

Tickle, laugh, slap.

Tickle, laugh, slap.

Tickle, SLAP.

Oh wait he didn’t laugh. Too bad. This is TORTURE. Thems da breaks. Stop giving such crappy acting performances and I”ll stop the torture. Anyways, finally when Keanu had learned to hold in his laughter, Randolf will cut on “Matrix: Revolutions” and “Reloaded” and everytime Mr. Reeves lookes confused, or says a line that’s completely inapropriately toned in the move, he gets stabbed with a hyperdermic needle in real life. Only in his arm though. It would be clean stabs. So that they could stop the bleeding with just tissue.

I can go on for hours about this. It’s fun. Really.

But I won’t.

Interesting show tonight at Mainstage. The crowd was in a weird mood. Kinda into the show, but very much into being silent. Bleh. Oh, i’ve written NOTHING today in the script. I suck. I’m tired. Oh wait. Maybe I’m not.

Back to torturing Keanu?

No. No. No. Thats not right.

My damn flyer fucked up my whole layout for this blog. Argh.

Don’t know why I just said argh. It just felt right.

I’m going to stop typing words. They don’t seem to be comunicating any thought, so they are, IN FACT worthless.

This is me stopping the words.

Right now.

No more words.

none.

okay, 2 more words.

batman out.

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